Podcast Transcription: The Real Secret to Success: How To Unlock Wealth, Health & Happiness with Peter Sage

Ted Ryce: Peter Sage, what is up my friend? So glad to have you back on the show. It's been, I don't know, over a year, I think. And you're one of our, the first episode that we did. Was one of our most, if not the most downloaded episodes ever. So it's an honor to have you back on this show and I'm really looking forward to catching up with you, man. 

Peter Sage: Yeah, it's a, I, all of our conversations have been a magical and added so much value to people. I'm excited for this one as well. And I'm grateful for the people tuning in because I think they're going to get a ride.  

Ted Ryce: Absolutely. So I want to frame our conversation like this. The people who listen to this show, they're executives, they're entrepreneurs, they're high performing professionals, mostly American and, living in different parts of the States, successful. 

They have a family, but typically their health is suffering. And of course you, you already know this story, Peter, I'm just sharing this for, the listeners, just to, put context, just to paint the picture. And when I think about you and myself included, although I'm nowhere near the extreme entrepreneur that you are, you're, you grew up in the UK, but you live in Tenerife. 

You look amazing. You got a great tan. We just had this discussion about why you live in Tenerife. And I always think about the biggest thing that Americans are facing. It's really the environment. So what I love to start out with is how do you see, especially Americans or, and of course, entrepreneurs in general, but like high performing people, their health starts to go. 

Their energy starts to go down as they age, what are the mistakes that they're making in that way?  

Peter Sage: A lot of it, Ted, is down to not understanding the difference between a life chasing success. What they think is success and a life chasing fulfillment and when you realize that the entrepreneurial joke is that a lot of people spend their life sacrificing, giving everything, getting into the office. 

Now all of a sudden you rewiring your brain to get your significance, your certainty, your dopamine from slaying dragons at work and conquering mountains, all that kind of stuff, right? That define the entrepreneurial spirit. And if you're one of the 1 percent of 1 percent that actually hits their number, right? 

Everyone's got a number and they're trying to hit their number. All right, 99. 9 percent never do. But let's just say we're going to put everybody listening in that category. Let me fuse your pace. What's likely to happen because I've worked with many of these people as I'm sure you have and that is that the entrepreneurial joke is you finally get to the top of success mountain having elbowed your way there by sacrificing time with your partner, missing your kids, grow up, sacrificing your health, all that kind of stuff. 

And now you get finally to the top of success mountain and you want to jump off because you don't like the view. Why? Because you cashed out and what do you want to spend your money on? I'll tell you what you spend your money on. you can now pay for your divorce. You can hire a health professional like you at best a surgeon at worst to try to get your health back and you can buy your kids loads of crap. 

So hopefully they love you again in your mind. it is, that is the road that so many people are hammering themselves down, making the mistake that thinking the more significant I am, the more fulfilled I will be, the more money I have, the more connection I will get, or the more validated I will be. 

And then they get to the top of success mountain one hang themselves. It's guys, come on, there's a, there's more foresight to that. But if your nose to the grindstone, sometimes it's going to be too late before the rumble strip on the side of the freeway catches your attention.  

Ted Ryce: Yeah, that's, so well said where you end up having to pay for these. 

You're in a great financial situation, but you're trying to buy your kids love. You're trying to, negotiate your divorce or maybe pay for your wife's love as well. If you're still together, you're hiring people like me, which thankfully, that's, it's got me in business. 

And also to your point with surgeons and doctors. So if that's the case, like how do you, the other thing that comes up, like, how do you know when is enough? How do you approach that? I feel like I do a good job. So I don't understand, I'm sure I make mistakes and I'm not saying that I don't or have my own issues, but I'm not as nearly successful as my clients. 

And there's a reason because I put my quality of life first. So is that what they, how do you coach, your clients on like how to get out of that place, how to change direction and not get to the top of a, to win a prize that they realize they don't even, they didn't even really want in the first place. 

Peter Sage: Actions, express priorities and priorities are based upon values. And it's a waste of time trying to get somebody to change their behavior without changing what they value. The problem is most people value internal feelings that are set up by external validation. I'll explain. So I value feeling certain, but in order for me to feel certain, I've got to have enough money to last two years if the business fails or send my kids to school. 

I want, if I want to feel that a good enough parent. And there's this dichotomy where entrepreneurs are excellent at being able to handle uncertainty in business. we don't know what we're going to earn next week. I've been unemployable for 33 years since I dropped out of school at 17 or 16. 

17 was my last paycheck. I'm comfortable at being able to handle the vicissitudes of business. But I also know where to value my quality of life and my quality of life isn't found in The cars I drive, the quality of life is found in how do I feel when I go to bed at night? How many smiles have I put on somebody's face? 

How much stress is dissipated out of my body because I'm not carrying different aspects of responsibility that are being keeps on my own shoulders because I've got a value structure that says, unless this happens, I'm ultimately not good enough. Yoda said something very profound and it's framed on my wall. 

It said, train yourself to let go of everything you fear to lose. Really profound statement. And you could get into Buddhism and non attachment and all of that stuff. But ultimately, the tighter you grip on trying to hang on to the rope to climb up Success Mountain, the more it's going to hurt, and the more disappointed you'll be at the top. 

So the first step, really, is to start asking better questions. Questions are the steering wheel of the mind. Questions direct focus, and most people are not trained in how to ask better questions. So imagine your brain as a faithful Labrador and a faithful Labrador, you throw a stick that Labrador is only going to do one thing is go get fetch the stick and drop it back on your carpet. 

Now, what most people are doing with their brain is throwing lousy sticks and your faithful Labrador of a brain is going to go bring an answer. Oh God, why is life so tough? Why does it always happen to me? God, what's wrong with me? why does it suck? why do my, you get the idea? And Asking lousy questions. 

And then you bitch about the fact that the Labrador is going to come and drop this soggy, wet, dirty stick on your clean carpet. So when it comes to quality of life, what sticks are you throwing? What questions are you asking? And how hard are you listening for the answers rather than your ego's ability to justify? 

For example, what's really, important to me in life. If I lost everything tomorrow, what would I value the most? If I was able to fast forward to my deathbed and have a conversation with my current self. What advice would I give about what's most important? People don't ask those questions. Yes, how can I fix the problem in my sales pipeline? 

Yes, how can I fill the gap in my HR? Because I need a new graphic designer because the other one quit. And we're focused so much on trying to fill the hole in our business. Yeah, we often hire the wrong people on, as I've always said, permit me for saying it to entrepreneurs, but far better to have a hole than an asshole right in the business, because yeah, you're not focused on being able to build relationships or attract high conscious people that are looking to serve. 

You're trying to look at a resume to fill a gap so that you don't feel the pain of having a gap in the business. Ask better questions. That's really a starting point. What's most important to you in life? Is it family? Because the, biggest mistake I see is that so many entrepreneurs, male entrepreneurs, and I know this is, yeah, we're not gender specific here, but it's, yeah, I'm, looking at stereotypes, for a reason, because there's more of a predominance in terms of the ratio. 

Yeah, working with, a lot of the entrepreneurs in the masculine energy, most men have been conditioned by society to link significance as a vehicle for connection and validation. The more money I get, the more girls will like me, the more, the better car I drive, the more people will respect me, blah, blah, blah, that kind of game. 

And it's reinforced through pop culture and magazine covers and everything else. Whereas women have been reinforced differently. They've been reinforced that the skinnier I am, the more fake makeup I put on and all the rest of it, the more desirable I'll be. And they play that game, right? we have the sound, but in business, the paradox is this. 

If you are chasing significance. As a vehicle to get connection, i. e. validation, it's never going to happen in the way you think. Why? Because the very definition of being significant means separate from, not part of the crowd, disconnected, more unique. the more separate I can be from everybody, the more connected I'm finally end up feeling. 

Doesn't work that way. If you flip it to the feminine side. Okay, the more makeup I put on, the more I'll be able to cover up the fact that I'm feeling less than inside. It's why one of the first things I learned from a mentor way back is that enthusiasm is the least expensive but the most beneficial cosmetic in the world. 

You've been around women that look like they've just stepped off a Paris catwalk and have the attitude of a crocodile. You don't want to be around them. Nope. You have people that have never touched makeup in their lives and yeah, wouldn't make the cover of Vogue, but there's just an energy, a dynamism, a spark. 

You want to be around those people. It's the same with the guys. You don't need money, right? True wealth is what's left when all your money is gone. And for some people they're so poor, all they have is money. Now we started to talk about different priorities.  

Ted Ryce: Yeah, I love that quote. It's important for sure. 

For example, I want to make more money. for me, it's more of a vehicle to have a certain type of lifestyle that affords me to go to the gym and afford healthy food and to live in an environment that brings peace, productivity, happiness, et cetera, close to my friends. More freedom. So how do we know if we're being fooled by our ego? 

How do we know oh, yeah, what you're saying is great, Peter, but yeah, that's not me. like, how do you know? And I know you just said the questions are there. We can ask ourselves what we value, but what would be the questions or the strategy to figure out? Are we in our own way right now with this? Or is our ego in our own way?  

Peter Sage: How far down the rabbit hole do you want to go?  

Ted Ryce: Keep it to, non qual, it's whatever you feel. It's going to make a joke, Peter. But however you want to answer that question, go for it.  

Peter Sage: There's value in depth, right? The whole internet is too full of surface BS memes and stuff that, yeah, sounds great. 

Yeah. It makes you feel smart at a cocktail party and changes nothing in your life. So if we want to give people listening here some valuable return on their time, let me set some frames for you. We'll start the mind's job. One of its primary jobs is to justify what is it to justify it justifies your current behavior to be in alignment with your current emotional state. 

Meaning if you said you're gonna get up at 6 a. m. and the alarm goes off and you're tired, the mind's job is to find the excuse to press the snooze button. If you are in an argument and you're angry, the mind's job is to come up with all the reasons why you shouldn't apologize and it's the other person's fault. 

So the mind will always justify. Now, once you know that, that's it's game, it has far less hold over. Oh, okay. Of course my mind is going to suggest that. Now, when you act on those suggestions, it's a different matter of again, priorities, willpower, levels of consciousness, but back to your main point. 

If you feel that your ego or mind is covering up for you, or you're not sure if you're acting on your own excuse itis, Justified under the fact that, no, that's really the right answer. Versus what is your truth with a capital T? Now, notice I said your truth, right? The truth with a capital T, I can let you know. 

Simple, right? The truth with a capital T that we fought over for centuries as to whose version is right. Alright, I can answer that quite quickly, right? The truth with a capital T is we don't know the damn truth. Alright, so give up the fight. Don't sign up for that class. But when it comes to our truth, what is our internal guidance system rather than our ego willing to let us in? 

You've got to understand a little bit about neuroscience. See, as human beings, and this is a conversation most entrepreneurs, don't often have, as human beings, we are the perfect encapsulation of physical and non physical in one form. We have a physical body, we're used to that, and we have a physical playground for that body to play in called physical matter reality, the outer world. 

But what makes us, is non physical. It's your goals, your hopes, your dreams, your desires, your values, your priorities, your sense of humor, your personality, your character. Now, none of that you can take out and put in a box and stick it on the shelf. That's non physical. But if I was to take all of that out of you, Ted, and put it in somebody else, you would be you with a different body. 

So the essence of what makes us, our awareness, our consciousness, our sense of individuation is non physical. So if we were to understand how we can influence reality, most entrepreneurs are stressed because they're fighting reality. They're in the outer world, trying to change the outer world matter to matter, but that's dealing with the slowest form of change. 

Meaning that Einstein, who was a pretty smart guy, never met him, but according to form knew what he was talking about. He said the sole governing agency of the particle, physical matter reality is the field. I the non physical, gives birth to the physical. The wave gives birth to the particle. 

He didn't say the sole governing agency of the field is the particle. We know that. So if we are to forget influencing the outer world, non physically, that's a separate podcast. But if we're talking about how do I tap into the innate intelligence of my body, my being, my soul, versus how do I not get distracted by the egoic tendencies of my mind, we need to just draw a context of understanding. 

Your body has a nervous system that is hardwired for comfort. Which is useful when it comes to, walking on sharp stones, or sitting on an ant's nest, or standing too close to the fire. But the essence of who you really are is non physical. And let's just call it your soul as a label, I'm not fussed about what label you want to use. 

Your soul is not wired for comfort, your soul is wired for growth. And we grow through challenge. So if you're identifying more with the physical part of you, your body, cause you're focused on the outer world and yeah, you're in a brainwave pattern between 12 Hertz and 18 Hertz or cycles per second, you are going to be more dialed into the data stream of your sense data, which is interpreting what you perceive to be physical matter reality. Are you okay so far? We're not too deep yet, right? Perfect depth. So when I'm stressed, when I'm focused on the outer world, when I'm trying to fight reality, win the deal, negotiate the prize, whatever it may be, I'm focused on trying to shift the outer world by wrestling with the outer world. 

And my brainwaves are in a beta brainwave state. And what that does, that disconnects me. Or shall I say reduces the connection between my non physical and makes the physical more real. Now, we know we don't get our best ideas when we're in beta. If you can slow your brainwaves down to anywhere between 8 and 12 hertz cycles per second, you enter into what we call alpha. Alpha is the domain of creativity. Alpha is where your inner world becomes more your center of gravity than your outer world. And a case in point, if you're reading a book, what you're doing is you are generating an entire non physical world as you read a Star Wars book, or a Jack Reacher book, or a novel, or a romantic novel, whatever it may be. 

You are creating that universe within you that's unique to you, not everybody else. They read the same words, but their version of what they think they're looking at in their mind is going to be different. So when you're reading a book, you're in alpha and someone could call your name in the outer world. 

You can't even hear them because you're so engrossed, i. e. your inner world becomes more. real or more your center of gravity than your outer world. And that's where creativity comes from. That's why we get our best ideas in the shower. Why we're not thinking about stuff. We're not in beta. We're working off automated habits because we don't think about how to wash our hair. 

It's automated how to brush our teeth, right? You don't have to learn how to walk every day. It's passed to the midbrain and therefore it becomes a habit. So we're not thinking, so we're not in beta. We're not using critical thinking in 12 Hertz or above. Okay. Which means that creativity can show up now. 

If you start lowering the volume of your sense data, including the self generated conversations in beta...  

Ted Ryce: right. The worrying rumination.  

Peter Sage: Because here's another thing people don't understand. They don't understand the evolutionary purpose of fear. Fear has one purpose, evolutionarily. It is to get our attention, garner it, and point it towards a physical danger. 

See, fear and danger are two different things. If we hear a growl outside the cave, if we spot a snake on a branch and we don't know if it's poisonous, whatever, We have a fear response to garner all of our focus onto a potential danger so that we are not distracted away from it. Other than that, fear plays absolutely zero, benefit in our life. 

Oh, no, fear is useful for not walking down a dark alley at night. No, no intelligence is useful for not walking down a dark alley at night, right? Fear is there to get your attention that your spider sense is picking up that there's something in that alley you want to avoid. After that, fear serves no purpose. 

A useful purpose apart from paralyzing you and making them more vulnerable. But if we then say, okay, if I can lower my brainwaves, I can get into alpha. If I can reduce stress, because if I start thinking of what evolution interprets as danger, see a thousand years ago, nobody was worried about their credit card bill. 

5, 000 years ago, nobody's lying asleep at night wondering if their boss is going to fire them. But all of that worry is still triggering the same evolutionary response as if there was a tiger prowling outside the cage. Why do people struggle to sleep at night? It's an evolutionary protection mechanism. 

If you go to sleep and you are worrying about something, you are going to elevate cortisol in the bloodstream. Now, if you have elevated cortisol, you will not be able to access deep sleep. Why? Because the reason you would have elevated cortisol 5, 000 years ago is if you heard there's a tiger prowling outside, and you want to know that the slightest snap of a twig is going to get you awake. 

Otherwise, you're going to end up being lunch. So if you're scared about your credit card bill, your boss, the economy, some crap you looked at on YouTube that says the world's going to end in 20 minutes, and you go to bed programming yourself with high cortisol. You're not going to get any deep levels of rejuvenating sleep. 

Now you wake up even after eight hours and you're still tired and you wonder why. And now your doctor puts you on some sort of crappy drug. In order to try to reduce the cortisol to make you sleep deeper. And all you really had to do was have a ritual before sleep that said, I forgive everyone for everything. 

Everything's going to be okay. I live in a friendly universe and I'm not going to try to control what I can't control. Some variance thereof, right? And you let go. So when you were able to relax, let's go to daytime. I'm doing a bit of a brain dump here, but it'll come full circle. I love it. If you're able to relax and you're able to get into a state of minimum alpha, at that point, you will start hearing more of a voice of truth than a voice of ego. In other words, the excuse you can't lie over the top of your own self truth. Your mind can distract you from it. You can come up with excuses as to why you don't want to listen to it. And you can, you know why you're not going to follow that path. Yeah. 

For some people, that voice was there when they married the person that, yeah, their mind overrode and says, no, I'm definitely marrying this person because I love them on an honest. Or, they're perfect, they fit all my pictures, but there was a niddle in the heart that said You know, when you're not having that self diluted conversation, there's some red flags you should really be looking at. 

And what does that cost you five years down the line? So does the ego try to convince you if you're more identified with your body, i. e. beta as a data stream for the outer world as a TV signal that you tuned into, right? Then your mind is going to offer a lot more justification based upon insecurities, egos, needs for validation, Primary fear of not feeling good enough, seeking short term pleasure to satisfy the, nervous system. 

You get the idea. If you're able to sidestep that lower your brainwaves, drop quarters all out of the system, learn how to relax without creating false flag scenarios in your own mind and conversations that you wish you'd had the courage to have had at the time and all that other stuff, and you're able to tune into your truth. 

which is why meditation is so powerful, then you're going to start getting more hunch, intuition, insight, download, gut feel. And that is your heart talking, not in language. Your mind talks in language. Your heart talks in feelings. Your heart's far more connected to what you should do than what you want to do or justify doing. 

That makes sense.  

Ted Ryce: Peter, just amazing. What I love about what you're saying, perfect amount of depth. And what I love about what you're saying, you're way more articulate and eloquent than I am. I feel at least I teach a lot of the same concepts, but I don't talk about brainwaves. I talk about defoes, defuse mode and focus mode in your brain. 

I just had this conversation with an entrepreneur client the other day, when, you know, before we hopped on, press record I shared a bit of it with you. So I just, it's so nice to hear it from You you're a mentor of mine and also to see how you talk about it, how you see it and what I just to tie things together for someone listening right now. 

Here, I'll say another thing. That I think is really important because what you're basically saying, at least the way I'm hearing it, it's this is about regulating your stress. Ultimately, it's about doing it from the top down versus for example, how you frame things, the story you tell yourself, your runaway thoughts. 

And it's also about doing it from the bottom up. that's what a, a neuroscientist might say. So it's about meditation. So you're not trying to relax. You're, doing this thing called meditation, or you could do other things as well. And it shifts your brain into a different state of acting. 

And that's when the truth of what you want, of what you think, like your heart starts. Let's say it doesn't start talking because it's always sending the signal, but let's say that other part quiets down and you can actually hear what you really want, how you really feel. And, I tell my clients and I, it's like my life's, goal is to explain to my clients. 

This isn't about getting jacked in the gym. It's about managing stress to be in that optimal zone because exercise is great. But if you do too much, of course, you've done all these crazy, marathons and desert death races and all the things. so it depends on what's too much for a person, but this is about doing the right amount. 

And go for it. You want to, you have something, a follow up there?  

Peter Sage: No, I was going to say that, especially with entrepreneurs, if you don't make time for health, you will have to make time for illness. It's just a law of diminishing returns until it slaps you.  

Ted Ryce: I want to interject there, Peter, because. You said that I say that here's the thing, everyone knows that, especially entrepreneurs, they're more intelligent, they realize it, especially at our age. 

We've seen our parents go down that road. How do you get that part of you to change your behavior?  

Peter Sage: If you can link exercise to what's important to them, not as a chore, cause I've got to go and lift weights, whatever, but to entrepreneurial success. In other words, if you want to be able to out negotiate in the boardroom, you've got to use your mind and discipline in a certain way that you can practice in the gym. 

If you want to be able to get into an alpha state, Or let go of your fear when you go to bed. Using the gym as an active meditation, as warrior training, high level ways where you can show up and sharpen your discipline. And that is going to translate into better business success, being more of an inspiration to your family, your kids, being able to demonstrate to your staff that you can become the example and invitation. 

To be able to save you money on all the coffee that you no longer need to drink to try to stay awake. Yeah, whatever it may be, if you can actually link what's relevant to them as a value, performance, success, ability to play football with their kids without running out of breath. Now, ability to have stamina when they get home so they can make love to their partner rather than saying, I'm too exhausted or too tired. 

Yeah. Or last an hour instead of three minutes. Yeah, whatever it may be, if you can say, okay, this is the pathway to get there. Oh, and by the way, you also look and feel awesome. Now you've got a different motivation than, Oh, I'm just going to lose some weight. Cause I don't like the weight. Makes sense. Love it. 

Ted Ryce: I do feel I do that, but maybe I can do a better job or maybe it just takes more repetition and I want to say something else. Because you invited me to event, you're having an event at the beginning of October, not exactly sure when this episode will go out, but, I'm having an event at the end of October. 

And one of the things that I feel is missing from like the current, let's say self help or whatever you, I don't know what you would call us. But like this transformation, this self help personal development. And. It's people listen to books, people are listening to this podcast and they're getting super hyped up because your energy is high and my energy is high and you and I know each other and, we were like minded and we're feeding off of each other's energy and they're feeling that and they're getting hyped up, but then the interview ends and then they get sucked right back into the day to day life and they don't make. 

They don't make the change and what I feel because I don't have to do an event and I'm sure you don't as well financially. I don't have to do it. I could sit behind my computer and just, run my business. But man, it's like the 2 things. Number 1, it fires me up. To meet in person, but more importantly, people change when they get around or when they get out of their environment and around different people. 

And I feel it's something that entrepreneurs, high performing professionals, it's something that I find they're missing. Usually they're the top person. Everyone's coming to them with their problems and they're solving it, but where their peers, sometimes they have peers. And usually at least in the States. 

Those peers, they want to go, put away a couple of bottles of a Petrus 2003, over, a 2000 calorie steak dinner. Okay. Every once in a while, but not weekly. That's part of the problem. And the alcohol, I enjoy a drink, a nice glass of wine, but alcohol, I don't know what you've seen Peter, but I've started to ask potential clients. 

About alcohol, because if someone's drinking every day, I had a guy, I'm not going to mention too many details about him, but he's a guy who sold a several companies. he's doing well financially to put it, humbly, He was drinking every night. I know he's not. And he's talking to me and he's in a good place, but not in a good place. 

Can you talk a little bit about Events. And I know I threw a lot at you there, but can you talk about what creates the most powerful transformation? Is it live events? Take it away, please. 

Peter Sage: As human beings., we are hardwired to adapt to our environment. We're the only mammal on Earth that requires its parents to be around for, yeah, about a decade or more in order to survive. 

Some people, three or four decades, right? But when it comes to how we're wired, we have what's called mirror neurons in the brain. Which means we're designed to copy our environment. We're not born with language being innate, verbal language. We're born to be able to copy. Now, our environment is so powerful that we will be programmed by it, whether we like it or not. 

And this is where I talk about the ant and the elephant. Imagine that your conscious mind is an ant, and that's walking towards your goals. And you've got your vision board and your affirmations and your sales targets and everything else. And you know that, you deserve. money. You know you deserve success. 

You know you deserve a better body and whatever, but your aunt is walking north over the back of a very large elephant, your limiting beliefs and programming, unconscious, that is marching south. And then you start wondering why you procrastinate, why you self sabotage. And so there are certain aspects of society that we can't escape. 

And one of them, what programs the elephant is the environment. I want to say environment. I'll tell you right now, the law of conformity, the 95 percent law, why 5 percent of people in the world own the world is inescapable. It's a primary law, meaning that if you hang around with nine recreational drug users, 95 percent chance, you're going to become the 10th. 

If you hang around with nine people that are setting six figure income goals per month as standard, you're going to, it's going to be normal for you. And what most people do is they surround themselves in an environment that doesn't support them, especially as entrepreneurs, because they're a lonely bunch at the top of the tree. 

They don't have a lot of support group. Too busy serving everybody else's needs. The classic historical female equivalent of that is the martyr pattern that my mother ran. Let's take care of everybody else without taking care of ourselves. And as the, eminent psychologist Gabor Marte says. Yeah, the number one correlation in breast cancer in all of the studies he's done, it's not smoking, it's not I'm vegan, you're carnivore, it's not any of that stuff, it's not I use crystals, I meditate, no. 

The number one common denominator that hit 95 percent was inability to draw boundaries. And he says it very eloquently, if you don't learn how to say no, your body will do it for you in the form of disease. very much. But on the flip side for the guys, now, when it comes to, yeah, environment and you're servicing your staff, you're serving your suppliers, yeah, you eat last at the end of the day, right? 

You may think you eat first, but you eat last, right? If there's only enough money to pay the staff's wages and not yours, you're the one that goes hungry, right? Now, yeah, you reap more of a harvest, but you're taking the risk, but when it comes to a product of our environment, one has to understand that, how do I set up my environment in order to win? 

Cause it's always going to influence. And if I've got alcohol in the house and I use that as a vehicle in order to. meet my needs. I'm, it's just too damn tempting when I'm tired at the end of the day of the week and I'm low energy and I've got no, I've been making decisions all day. I just want a freaking glass. 

I deserve a glass of wine. And now you hit the justification of the mind come in to give you all the verbiage for you to buy into. Has nothing to do with your truth. Now, Ted, since you've known me probably for the last six years or so, I've had an Oura ring. I don't know if you're obviously familiar with Oura 

Ted Ryce: Sure.  

Peter Sage: Yep. So for me, it's pretty easy to see the effect of alcohol on sleep. And this is where it gets fascinating because what I've noticed, one glass of wine before bed, one glass, and I'm in pretty good shape. Yep. For 52 years old, I'm off to row the Atlantic at the end of this year. All right. I'm in pretty good shape. 

Now, one glass of wine takes my average night heart rate from around 56 58 to 68 70. Now, that's average over 6 hours, right? Says he, reaching for a calculator just to check the math here. Okay, let's have a look at 13, let's just call it 13 beats a minute. Times 60 equals times 6 to 6. 5. Yeah, that's pretty much bang on. 

One glass of wine makes your heart beat to process that alcohol out of your system an extra 5, 000 beats a night. Think about that. Your heart has a lifespan. And one glass of wine, 5, 000 extra beats. That's if you're in shape like you and I. 5, 000 extra. Now, what could you do with the energy that would have been saved by not having the heart to work over an additional 5, 000 beats while trying to repair your body because it's trying to process alcohol through the liver? 

Does that mean that we should all, Abstain and, go, teat up. No, because life's about variety. But it's also about understanding that you're making choices with full knowledge of the facts. So do I enjoy a glass of wine? I've got a winery at my home. I've got a two story wine cellar. Yeah, I celebrate now and again with a bottle of Unico. 

Yeah, that's one of my favorite wines, Vega Sicilia. But do I do it every night? Hell no. Do I do it if I've got a heavy week coming up? No, because I understand what my priorities are. Am I drinking much right now while I'm training to go row the damned Atlantic from Lagomera here in the Canaries to Antigua? 

You know what that takes? 

Ted Ryce: I don't, actually. But a lot.  

Peter Sage: Yeah, it's an event called The World's Toughest Row. Feel free to check it out. It happens every year. I'm in the pair. So I'm rowing with a childhood friend of mine, did 22 years as a Royal Marine Commando. And we're going to be rowing Two hours on, two hours off. 

That's the switch. So somebody's rowing at all times. So it's two hours on, two hours off, and a tiny little rowing boat with no engine, couple of solar panels to power the desalinator, all food on board, unsupported. Nobody touches the boat during the race, right? No resupply, no nothing.  

Ted Ryce: How long is this race? How long does it take you? How many hours or a day?  

Peter Sage: It's 3, 000 miles, 5, 000 kilometers. Across the Atlantic, just imagine a toothpick in a jacuzzi. Wow. And two hours on, two hours off, 24 7, two months. 

Ted Ryce: Two months?! Oh! Wow.  

Peter Sage: Now you may ask, why am I doing that? It's a pretty good question. I'm sure I'll be asking that myself on day two. 

But essentially there's a couple of reasons, and this is again, where you start associating what are you doing this for? Because if you're going to the gym just to try to lose weight because you want to be, yeah, more, that ain't going to cut it. Your mind's going to justify why you shouldn't go the second that your energy drops. 

And so one of the reasons I'm doing that is because I want to find out where I currently sit for myself on the totem pole of self mastery. I teach self mastery. I practice self mastery, but right now I'm pretty comfortable. when we spoke on our first episode, I was a third of a million dollars in debt. 

I just had a massive recorrection, as my story in the book, The Inside Track, which you gave me a very nice testimonial for. Thank you, Ted. And I was hustling to get back on my feet. Yeah. Fast forward, a couple of years later, I'm back into multi million dollar lifestyle, blah, blah, blah, and financially I am omfortable. 

But that's a pretty poor place to be if the essence of who I am is wired for growth. for me, I'm a month into the race, for example. The nearest human is in the International Space Station. The nearest land is five miles underneath me. I haven't eaten for 24 hours because I'm seasick, because the swells are at about 15 feet. 

We've capsized every hour just, rolling around in the tiny little cabin that I can't even lay down flat in. And I've got salt blisters on my hands, I've got salt blisters on my ass, I'm exhausted, I feel like crap, and my alarm goes off for me to go out and row backwards in the dark in a raging sea for my two hour stint. 

Do you think that at that point my mind's going to give me every single excuse as to why the hell I should just quit? That's why I want to find out where I'm at. And I might quit. Who knows? But if I do, then I'll never teach any more self mastery because I'm no longer qualified to teach. selfish reason, I want to find out where I currently sit on my own totem pole of whether I'm still qualified to teach what I preach. 

Second reason, I want to use this as a contrast frame to inspire a lot of people. So it's not about me rowing the Atlantic, leave that for the crazies. This is about what's your row. For some people, it's a business failure. For some people, it's a traumatic divorce. For some people, it's a stage four diagnosis. 

What is your row and how are you going to dig deep to get through it? For some people, it may be their first three miles on a treadmill, getting their ass off the, yeah, out of the wine bottle at the end of the week and actually go to the gym and build up to their first three mile. Cause they've just seen me row 3000. 

So how can I inspire other people through the contrast frame of what I can do? And hopefully. Get everybody else to follow whatever their role is or give them inspiration to get through their challenges if they're facing them right now, through hopefully what we do.  

And then the last reason is we should be raising a lot of money for mental health, and for about a million dollars for, good causes, for veterans, for, yeah, first responders, and people that suffer with, what we would call the invisible wounds, the PTSD, the anxiety that, yeah, because mental health has two sides. 

There's a side a lot of people associate, which is anxiety, depression, yeah, leading to suicide, stress, that kind of thing. And then there's the other side, which is mental mastery. It's what I teach, so I'll go demonstrate mental mastery and raise a lot of money for the people who are on the other side, hopefully so they can start crossing over into the side that we give. 

Ted Ryce: Love that, Peter. And wow, I've never even heard of that race before. I definitely have to have you back on the show after you do it to... and that's insane, but I also appreciate why you're doing it. And it has to do with, and one of the things that you're pointing at it's, or, alluding to is this isn't about, this is your particular row, but. 

We all face challenges. I always tell people, look, because, my story, my whole family's gone, right? It's like best case scenario. You're going to watch your parents get old and die. Best case scenario through old age. And then you'll be alone and you'll be next. And, we all have to make peace with that somehow and find purpose to go on somehow and not to get stuck in the narratives like, oh, I'm old and, oh, life or is bad and you have to find a way to go on and enjoy life because what else is there to do really? 

It ties into why are we actually here? And what would you say about that? I guess it's different for everyone. So that's something that I'm personally, I'm at this stage. My dad died four years ago while I was going through your elite mentorship forum. It helped a lot, but it also, I got derailed. 

What would you say about that?  

Peter Sage: Everybody's got their own individual level of beliefs and the primary outcome in my view for whatever belief you choose, Is to empower you, not disempower you. So for me, what is the primary purpose of actually being here? if you look at nature is evolving. 

We know that evolution is driven by call it a biological algorithm or whatever you term you want to use. And if we look back in human history, if we look at 500, 400 million years of fossil records, it tells a pretty compelling case that evolution starts off with, let's say, single celled amoeba or from bacteria into single cell amoeba, and then has progressed through millions of years into something as complex as a 50 trillion cell human. 

If you were to take 50 individual amoebas and you were to introduce one food source, What do you got? War, right? It's survival of the fittest. It's if you don't take, you end up getting exited. But as a human being, if we introduce one food source into our mouth, we don't have 50 trillion cells fighting each other. 

We don't have the liver, ganging up against the spleen for who's going to get the most hemoglobin. So what is required to make that transition? What is, the, fossil records telling us? on one side, you have competition on the other side. The only thing that makes evolution work is cooperation. 

And so if you take the word cooperation and you extrapolate that to a logical conclusion in my small limited third dimensional mind, I can only really come up with the following, which is the purpose of why we're here is essentially to learn how to love. And. To choose love over fear in ever more challenging circumstances. 

That is the essence of growth, not how big I can get my biceps. That's the physical world and everything in the physical world is subject to the law of impermanence. The very definition of physical means that your destination is non physical. So back to Yoda's words, train yourself to let go of everything you fear to lose. 

And most people have an attachment to their relationships. And when we come to understand that every single relationship ends, everyone. Now, I don't care if that's a relationship with your parents or relationship with your kids or relationship with your business or relationship with your soulmate or a relationship with your body. 

At some point that relationship is going to end now, when we come to terms and accept that fact, and I've not found any compelling evidence to suggest that won't happen, then imagine the relationships we have that are like walls that are around us, with artwork and the challenge we can appreciate that artwork. 

But the second we start leaning on that wall, the second we start having too much attachment. I don't want this wall to fall over. The harder we lean on that wall, when that wall eventually goes, as it must at some point, as may go first, but let's just say that wall crashes. Then how hard do you fall based upon how hard are you leaning on it? 

And the people that have had the most enlightening lives that I've had the privilege of spending time with are able to stand in their art gallery and admire and love and give thanks for the paintings around them. Without leaning so heavily on them that when that wall goes, they crash. And we see this a lot. 

You lose a loved one and people don't recover for four years. You have a bad breakup and you don't recover for years because you were leaning so hard against that wall that when it went, you hit the ground hard and you struggled to get back up. But every relationship ends, which means the most important relationship is the last one you're going to be left with, which is your relationship to life. 

And if you don't have an empowering way of being able to frame that as the gift that you've been sent here to be able to learn how to be more loving and less fearful, then you're going to get feedback from life. You're probably leaning too heavy on some of the walls are about to crash  

Ted Ryce: wasn't planning on asking you about that, Peter, but it felt right to go there. 

And I want to say something else to what you're saying, I, gave the example that you're going to watch your parents grow old and die best case scenario. And you also mentioned, all our relationships. In fact, I saw, an 88 year old man talking about how his wife had died recently. 

So someone in the relationship that you're in best case scenario, one of you is going to go first. And, he actually seemed to be handling it well during the interview, at least. I don't know what happens behind closed doors, but it also reminded me of. My own experience, I mentioned earlier, I've talked about my dad several times on the podcast throughout the years since he's been gone and I love my dad and I realize he did his best and set me up in a way like, that I'm so grateful for right now. 

And I feel pass the baton and it's up to me to do a better job. Then what he did, however, 1 of the things that I learned from that experience, because I, he went into organ failure. He got transferred to hospice. It was either. He was going to last for maybe another month on dialysis. 

Which is a big deal having to have it done every day, or he was going to go into hospice. And after discussing it with him, it was just time to stop. It was time to let nature take its course. And when he went into hospice, my, what I thought was going to happen was we were going to spend some time together and get to have conversations and some closure. 

If you want to use that word, but what actually happened was I showed up right after they transferred him to hospice and he was like, Ted, Oh, glad you're here. Oh yeah. And then he handed me his cell phone. Cause that was the thing he was really connected to, like most people, including myself right now. 

And he handed me the cell phone. But once he did the moment of truth hit him of what was happening. And before my dad had, been like, ah, tomorrow's a good, I'm ready to die. But after he gave me that cell phone, he just started breaking down with the truth of what was happening. 

And the nurse ended up. Giving, she asked him, are you in pain? And certainly he was in physical pain, but I think he was in more emotional pain, especially at that moment, gave him a shot. he got drowsy, ended up falling asleep and that was the end of him. And that was passed on to me in that moment. And I've had to process and deal with it. 

And cause it gave me the fear, we're having this conversation about love and fear and he passed on this fear to me. And, and again, this isn't being critical of him. it's just, stating the facts of what happened or at least how I saw it and experienced it. And i'm like, I do not want to fucking do that. 

I don't have a kid yet, I feel like I want to but I don't want to whoever's there for me at the end. I don't want to pass that on I want to make sure I pass on love. And I just wanted to share that because I feel like it's exactly what you're talking about. And I feel nobody is going to remember most of us a hundred years from now is the truth. 

Hopefully, maybe some of us will make it, make something that lasts a really long time. But yeah, I was going to give an example, but most people, it's just, yeah. So what are you, for the people who matter most for you, what legacy are you leaving behind? And that's what I think about with what you said. 

Peter Sage: Nobody on their deathbed turned around and said, please go get me my mahogany framed MBA certificate. Nobody turned around and said, please go get me the keys to my Bentley. My first stock certificate that shows a million. Nobody says, I'll say the same thing. Please go get me the people I care about the most so I can tell them I love them one more time. 

Even if they're not able to say that, it's certainly what they're thinking. When confronted with our own mortality in this particular movie of our life, before we go to the after party and yeah, eventually pick up another script, or whatever your belief system, then, we realize that what are we here to do? 

We're here to learn how to become better actors in front of the camera, before we go back behind the camera. What does that mean? Choose love over fear in ever more challenging circumstances. We're not going to get it right. We're not meant to get it right all the time. no student has a hundred percent pass rate throughout the entire school. 

If you get all the answers, right in class, you're in the wrong class. Now we're here to learn probably more from the wrong answers. We give them the right answers, which is why the failed relationships hurt. They hurt for a reason because they allow us to learn how to not do that again, or how to be less selfish or egocentric or how to be, yeah, how to draw boundaries and not be taken advantage of by narcissists or whatever it may be. 

We're here to learn what we're in the playground of life. And the way that I see it, that there's a rule set that really supports us, and I'll leave people with this as a metaphor. If you're in the kitchen of life, you've got to understand that everything is provided in terms of the freshest ingredients, the equipment, you've got the ovens and the hobs and the grills and the utensils and all of the condiments and the spices and everything else. 

And a lot of people sit there bitching about the fact they're hungry. Now, not so much entrepreneurs. they're out trying to, yeah, they're in the kitchen hustling, but there's a rule set. The rule set is tight and it means we can work with it. If you oversalt the pizza, you're going to get salty pizza that I can work with. 

If you salt the pizza and one time it comes out salty and one time it comes out sweet on the same amount of salt, I'm confused. I can't work with that rule set. If you're working a hundred hours a week and all of a sudden you get out of breath because your chest gets tight walking upstairs, that's a rule set you can work with. 

Ah, you adjust the amount of salt on the pizza. Why? Cause the kitchen is set up to help you to win, which is why the rule set gives such great feedback. Nobody's coming to save you. No one's going to cook the food for you. That's not the purpose of earth school is so you can start to learn how to be a better chef. 

And yeah, you're going to make some meals that are going to taste like crap. You're going to have pull some stuff out of the oven with high hopes and your souffle is going to look like a puddle. That's okay, because you're still working with the rule set. What did I do wrong? Where did I go wrong? What happened to, to shift that? 

And what can I do next time to make it better? Welcome to earth school.  

Ted Ryce: Powerful way to end this conversation, Peter. And, if you're listening right now and you want, if you want to get in contact with Peter and perhaps work with him or go to one of his events, Go to peter sage. com and you can also go to elite mentorship forum dot NL dot com. 

Okay. Elite mentorship forum. com and Peter, you're amazing, man. It's been a while and just every time I talk with you, I'm just. Looking at things differently, but most importantly, feeling differently. So thanks so much. You just knocked it out of the park, like usual.  

Peter Sage: My pleasure, Ted. And it's such a great way to see you in your prime to doing what you're doing, helping so many people still passionate about where you are being so authentic, having gone through. 

And I, I witnessed the whole transition with you and your dad, where, what you were sharing, and how you really have picked up that baton and you really are walking in a direction that I know he's proud of.  

Ted Ryce: Thanks so much brother. Did you have the book there? Did you want to show it? That's okay. 

You can throw in the show notes if you want. But the inside track. Yeah. It's an amazing book. One of the most powerful books I've read. And yeah, I gave a, a testimonial to it and thank you for even inviting me to do that. Because when I read it, I was going through a bit of a tough time. And so talking to you and also reading that book. 

And then eventually working with you in the lead mentorship form, it really provided, yeah, it helped a lot, man. So, thank you so much.  

Peter Sage: You're very welcome. Thank you, Ted. And thank you to everybody listening for being gracious enough to give us their time. And yeah, my only wish out of the time that we've given here today is that they take something from this and make a change. 

Ted Ryce: Amazing.